When life is so messy, it's easy to doubt and give up.
Through the years, it has become undeniable or inevitable that each of us go through trials that are way bearable; more than what we can even imagine. Sometimes, we feel like it's the end of the world and we've got no way out and could no longer go too far. Often times, life for us,becomes a series of lost expectations, hurt, anxiety and depression, and a whole lot of pain. Immense pain that's as sharp as a knife – good enough to kill someone or in this case, us – the sufferer; the victims of this but broken world. As a 19 year-old teenager, I can almost say that I've suffered long enough to recover from the misery of the past. I may be exaggerating a bit but I can tell you – I've experienced stuff other people my age haven't. Well, it's nothing like the ones you see on TV, but it's something that has always been on the inside. It's like a battle against something I haven't known back then.
There are times when I struggle finding that peace of mind which always distracts me from things I have to do and probably the positivity that must've been there right at that time. Occasionally, I feel this blank mind and disrupted focus that I'm not sure about what I should be doing. I start to pity myself for not being able to do things I should've done or places I should've went to, people I could've met – all these petty things that seemed so essential and of a big deal to me that time. I wonder, what was in me long way back that almost got me out of mind? I seem to have bigger problems now but I was way worst prior to these days. Was it just part of growing up that I have finally outgrown?
Now, in the present time, I still feel that pang of self pity and comparison between myself and other people but out of the blue, I suddenly feel a hand helping me up or a pair of arms carrying me back to the shore making sure I get right back on track. I don't know if you've been through the same thing in your life that you begin to get rid of all the positivity and embrace the negativity. I think everyone, in one way or another, have encountered fighting for peace within you and your surroundings, wherever that may be. The only thing I can share to you or most likely advice you is that – it's easy to give up, it's easy to just sleep your problems off and wallow in despair, but sometimes, it does take the will to get back up, the will to continue this race with perseverance and the willingness to call on to God whether things get rough or when things are just going fine.
Growing up, I've heard a lot of Christian stories speaking about hope and endurance and security in God that have inspired and reminded me that God has always been by my side. If you've heard or if you know about The Footprints In The Sand, well and good. If not, I'm going to post it here and I hope you get the point of what this post is all about. When you go through hard times, don't ever think that God has left you; He didn't.Sometimes, it just takes a sound mind to realize that it was you who has looked at things the wrong way and God had nothing to do with it all along.
I'm sharing this because I've been through it and still going through it somehow, albeit I'm100% sure that I'm not walking this journey alone, because of the circumstances I face, I just absent-mindlessly forget about all the things above.
Let's get reminded that God has always been good no matter what. Smile big!
Footprints In The Sand
One night a man had a dream.
He dreamed he was walking along the beach with the Lord.
Across the sky flashed scenes from his life.
For each scene, he notice two sets of footprints in the sand:
One belonging to him, and the other to the Lord.
When the last scene of his life flashed before him,
he looked back at the footprints in the sand.
He noticed that many times along the
path of his life there was only one set of footprints.
He also noticed that it happened at the very lowest
and saddest times in his life.
This really bothered him and he questioned the Lord about it.
“Lord, you said that once I decided to follow you,
you'd walk with me all the way.
But I have noticed that during the most troublesome
times in my life there is only one set of footprints.
I don't understand why when I needed
You most you would leave me.”
The lord replied, “My precious child, I love you
and I would never leave you.
During your times of trial and suffering, when
you see only one set of footprints in the sand,
it was then that I carried you.”
This story really brings me back to the times in my life where I felt like God has abandoned me. Sometimes, I even feel like I'm all alone and I just need someone to breathe air into what I feel like a lifeless body. But then again, I'm going back to square one –
Jesus + Nothing = Everything.
If you're reading this and you can relate to it, don't let take it too long, do the most wonderful thing anyone could ever do – that is to surrender everything to God and let Him carry you too. I love you, but I am most certain that God loves you more!
A mixture of life, love, faith, and everything in between. Welcome to my space!
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